It’s been a while since I was in trouble with the law.
Truth be told, I don’t think it’s ever really happened to me – until last week, that is.
I’ve always prided myself on being a capable driver. More than capable, at least, of taking my family from point A to B without causing any major incidents. Although I wasn’t at the heart of a serious Road Traffic Accident on the way back from Scotland at the weekend, I did manage to get caught speeding and now I’m fretting over whether to tell my wife or try and contest the fine.
We’d been visiting family over the weekend and I’d been left in the thankless role of late-night driver. Constance had fallen asleep within minutes of leaving Dunblane. We’d been visiting her parents and had ended up spending much more time than we’d expected on our feet. Having recently become obsessed with exercise, the in-laws had been in a constant buzz of activity since New Year.
Galvanised by social media and spurred on by their similarly loopy friends, they had taken on jogging, cycling and going to the gym. Every day was a good day to exercise and our visit just gave them more opportunity to exhibit their new found lust for life. From the Friday we arrived we were pretty much whisked out of the door, back into the car and onto the nearby Highlands where the kids were allowed to run wild and we quickly lost our breaths.
Constance and I knew we were in for a few surprises, but hadn’t expected her parents to be in such good shape.
In their mid to late sixties they’d both lost weight and appeared to be more spry than ever, the kids were even struggling to keep up with them towards the end. It was a with a sigh of relief that we sunk back into the car at the end of the weekend, hence the sleeping kids and wife accompanying me on the drive back down South.
I don’t remember the speedometer rising to as high as the fine says, so I was a little surprised, to say the least when it popped up on my doorstep.
Luckily, Constance was out at work when the post arrived. So when I peeled open the official looking envelope and swore loudly when discovering the contents; the only witness to my indiscretion was the cat who – so far – hasn’t dobbed me in yet.
This being my first driving offence and not remembering the incident itself I felt like this had to be some kind of mistake. So, with a whole day ahead left until Constance would return and inevitably see the guilty look on my face, I decided to a little research and see if I couldn’t get the whole thing overturned. After all, if she found out that a camera had caught me barrelling through the Highlands at a hair-raising 80 mph, there’d be a good chance that I’d lose my driving privileges.